Today I saw a quote that circulates on Facebook every now and then. Maybe you've seen it.
It goes like this:
UNCOACHABLE KIDS BECOME UNEMPLOYABLE ADULTS.
While that sounds great in theory, I'm not 100% sure that it's accurate. I mean, I think that we've all worked with a few uncoachable adults . . . so obviously, they can get a job . . . they just make the rest of us miserable.
Someone told me once that "it is very difficult having a coach for a mom." Now that . . . that I have to agree with and I have to own it. And my kids would probably give that statement a resounding amen.
But here is the thing, one of the greatest compliments I've received about one of my kids is that they are coachable . . . and I have heard that about each of them.
Now listen, my kids ARE coachable . . . you don't grow up with a coach for a mother and survive without learning to be coachable. Our entire parenting approach is more coaching than anything else.
At 18 years old, Ken Levine, who is an owner/operator for McDonald's said something to me that totally rocked my 18 year old self. He said, "Sherry, the crew and other managers will copy what you do wrong almost 100% of the time and they will do it twice as well. On the other hand, they will only copy what you do right 50% of the time and they will do that only half as well."
That stuck.
It not only stuck but it put even more pressure on a young adult with an undiagnosed anxiety disorder. Thanks Ken. Thanks a lot.
But here is the thing . . . it didn't just stick and put pressure on me. It became a core value in my life. I determined to be the best version of me . . . way before "being the best version of yourself" was the cool saying it is today. There was no way I wanted to be responsible for anyone doing what I did wrong twice as well.
Before I go any further . . . Do. Not. Start. With. Me. At 50 years old, I know damn well that back then, I took it to an unhealthy place and I know damn well that I am not responsible for the choices other people make.
But here is the point, I made a full-on commitment to continued professional and personal growth because I wanted to be a healthy (not perfect!) example of a parent, a spouse, a leader and a friend.
As I began to surround myself with individuals I could learn from, I had to learn that no one can coach you in all areas of your life . . .
I have a fundraising coach that I hired and at first paid for out of my own pocket . . . while I was a volunteer Executive Director. Yes, I paid for my own professional development as a volunteer. I have a spiritual dad that is only a phone call away. I have a friend that is a business owner and has served on several nonprofit boards . . . we meet for lunch from time to time. We eat sushi and I pick his brain.
I know someone that has worked in nonprofits most of his adult life. I talk to him probably only once a year. Each time he kicks my butt, accepts no excuses from me but at the same time, he always reminds me that I have the skill set to be successful. I have a close friend that works in law enforcement and when I want blunt, nothing held back, advice . . . I call him.
Listen, I won't ask my fundraising coach to guide me spiritually. I won't ask my once-a-year-call coach for advice on parenting. I won't seek out my spiritual dad when I need to brainstorm new fundraising ideas. I'm not going to ask my police chief friend for advice on leading a devotional. And I'm not going to ask my business owner friend for advice on security at my nonprofit.
But I have chosen to be coachable and each of these men wear a coach hat in my life. Each of these men make me better.
Who is wearing a coach hat in your life? What example are you setting to your kids? Do they see a coachable parent . . . or one that thinks they don't need to be coached?
Coachable adults raise coachable kids. Period.
